Ooooh, the Shame

I love my oldest Brother.

He is a JackAss... (don't worry, I tell him that personally!) and (He already knows this)

You cannot tell him anything! Because everyone is wrong, except him.

Here is an excerpt from a recent conversation....

Bro: They put a guard rail in the middle of the interstate

Me: Do you know why they did that?

Bro: NO

Me: So if you have an accident in the middle, you don't cross over and run into oncoming traffic.

Bro: But now I can't turn around if I need to

Me: It is illegal to make a U-turn in the median

Bro: Well, I am not driving 20 miles to the next exit just to turn around.

Me: But it is illegal, have you not ever noticed the sign stating 'Authorized Vehicles Only'?

Bro: So, who is authorized?

Me: Police, firetrucks, ambulances.....

Bro: I wish I could pay an extra hundred dollars to get a license that allowed me to drive 100 mph....

Me: You don't really turn around in the median do you?

Bro: Only when I need to!

He commutes 150 miles miles to work and does not have a clue! With all the crazies out on the road, it breaks my heart to know that my own flesh and blood is one of them!!