Run Forest Run.....

Okay, I got out and ran again today...

It was raining again.....

But I am determined to actually keep it up this time, I mean after all, it is good for me physically and mentally, right?

So, you might notice (because i am either very bored or very silly) that I have added a picture on my sidebar. This picture indicates exactly how far I have run at the end of each month. There will be place markers for the month end totals.

Also, for anyone else who may not have already noticed, beneath it is a caption title "She's Going the Distance" This is the totals recorded for each month. Just thought it might be fun to actually follow my progress, as if I was going somewhere. If Forest Gump can do it, then why not me.

And DAD, I did edit January's total because according to previous posts, I did manage 10 miles instead of five. I know you caught that....

Oh yeah, in case you are wondering, the starting point is the beginning of Interstate 40 in Wilmington, North Carolina. Wonder how many years it will take me to reach Barstow, California?

hahh haha ha aha ah...... damn, I am bored

I Checked The Weather and....

It's raining outside.

That used to be code for I am going to go smoke a cigarette.

I don't check the weather as often anymore, but today I wanted to run! It has not slacked up, but I think I will run anyway (in my old shoes!) I found a trusty hooded water resistant light weight jacket, so no more excuses, RIGHT?

but I digress........

So, in place of cigarettes, I have adopted a fondness for this. I know you are not supposed to replace one addiction for another, but I need the extra help right now! I went to my local grocery store to purchase the big bag, but they were out !.. UGH!!

NO, I have not bought a pack of cigarettes, although I will admit I have cheated a few times. I still have not bought any, though. Well, now I have advanced to Phase Two of the patches which , of course has a loser dosage of nicotine and my body can tell. So, time to up the will power and fight those nasty cravings. It has been five weeks...

Remember this? Go on, click it!!!

Tootsie Roll how I love your chocolately chew. Tootsie Roll, I think I am in love with you!!

Definitely better than this!!

How Could That Be Possible?

I have been doing really well with my running here lately. In fact, I had decided to add another mile. That would put me up to 6 miles at a time. However, not to be deceptive, it is not all running. I go for half mile stretches, alternating a fast walk with a not so fast jog. But hey, whatever it takes to keep me motivated right. I find this routine works very well for me.

My last time out, I incorporated the additional mile with no problems whatsoever. So, I decided to treat myself to a couple of rewards, so to speak. First, I ordered new ear buds for my mp3. The ones I have now do not stay in my ears while I am pounding the pavement, and my brother had found some that squish up into your ears for better staying power. Second, I thought some nice new running shoes were in order. Once again, my small feet betrayed me. No store within a 30 mile radius carries any type of athletic shoe in an adult 5. Frustrated and not wanting to wait for shipping delays through ordering on-line, I decided to purchase a child's running shoe. It was the exact same shoe, except the sole is thinner. and only half the price.

I put them on, they felt wonderful. I had been running in some really old cross trainers that were past worn out. So, today I slipped them on the new kiddie shoes and set out to conquer another 6 miles.



What The Hell. As I ventured out (it is a half mile walk to my course, which I do not figure into my accumulated distance) I noticed that I was walking as if I was flat footed. CLUMP CLUMP CLUMP. When I got down to the track and started running, it didn't take 100 feet for my calf muscles to scream out in protest. They were on fire!! Now I have been running for a year and surely during this period I have used those muscles before. I did manage to complete the first lap with an extremely painful look on my face. Hell, it was extremely painful to finish. The second lap (walking) was damn near as painful. CLUMP CLUMP CLUMP. But I remained determined.

Okay, so I wussed out at 5 Miles. And thankfully, the kiddie shoes were a little broken in by the time I gave up. Not to mention those angry muscles had loosened up a bit.

I think if I continue to wear them, they will be fine once they are broken in. But with the amount of pain they caused me today, I am tempted to go back to the old broke down cross trainers. They never once hurt me, at all!!

On the bright side, by the end of 5 miles and a lot of grimacing I am no longer flat footed! But now, my arches hurt! Hopefully that will go away as the shoes get worn. What do you think?

EDIT: A few hours later and now my arches and ankles are killing me. So much for not wanting to wait... I have bought the wrong shoe, childsize or not! I am an underpronator, which means I run/walk on the outside of my foot. The correct shoe is available in Huntsville and in my adult size. Looks like I am taking that trip to Bama. The shoe I purchased is for someone who pronates normally. Damn, that is why I went to a sports store, so the friendly KNOWLEDGEABLE staff could point me in the right direction. No wonder those muscles were screaming at me. More than likely they are not used often any way, in my underpronated stride.

Dating Woes

No, this is not a post about me whining and pouting because I have not met that certain someone. Au contraire, mon ami. Lets face it, I do have options. I just choose to be particular. For example, I have several customers on my route who would love to "love" me each and every week. But I have set limitations to my socialization with customers. But still, there is potential there to have long distance relationships. I just choose not to.

So, this week Superman calls me and asks how I have been doing. I remarked that I had been through a depressed spell for quite sometime and was working my way out of it. He suggests we get together some weekend and hang out, as friends. That actually did not sound like a bad idea. I mean, I like the guy in low doses... Just not as a potential mate, too much going on there. But as a social acquaintance, well sure!

So, immediately he begins this onslaught of texts and calling. By the second day, I came up with an excuse as to why we couldn't get together this weekend. See, I thought he seriously meant as friends. Obviously, that was not his intention. You see, ever since I rendered my excuse, he has been texting silly messages and coaxing me to reply. I did, once or twice. But then he asks the fatal question , " Wouldn't you like to call in sick to work from now on and just work on the next 20-30 years?" I asked what this meant and he replied , "That means you should pack all your stuff and move in with me."

Oh Dear!! I think he misunderstood my depression remark. I have not been depressed over our termination of relationship. In fact, I could not get out of that quick enough. I have just been blue. I think he may have got his hopes up that I wanted to date him again... Ummmm nooo!

I am Psychic... Trust Me!!

In the past few days, I have been doing a little cleaning around my blog. Nothing you will notice.

So, I stumbled upon an old post from February of 2007. I clicked the links and followed the story line until it led me to the part that said that MOST of my customers were closed on President's Day last year. Hmmmm, so Monday is President's Day...

After making a quick phone call, I was assured that the customers would indeed be open.

I call BULLSHIT! Remember, I know these customers and their habits. I even blogged about them being closed last year. I have proof!! But I was told to Go North, Young Lass!!

So, I will and don't be surprised if I have a post describing the wonderful day I spent in Queen's with a new friend. Because he is off on Monday, too!!

And Speaking of BAD Drivers

Yesterday I had the most harrowing (sp?) to date in a big truck.

Seven miles from home, I exit the Interstate, make a right turn and proceed to the traffic light that will guide me home. In the direction I am traveling, this particular signal has two lanes. The left lane is for left turns and straight ahead traffic. The right lane is for RIGHT TURNS ONLY. There is also a railroad crossing about 15 feet from the signal. Just enough room for one car to get across the tracks and trigger the light. In a big truck, you have to remain 30 feet or so from the intersection because this particular track is used frequently throughout the day.

The signal was red and is often backed up for a mile or better trying to get through the intersection. There were several cars in front of me. When the signal turned green, the folks in front of me were slow to proceed. In fact, I think the woman in front of me was slow to do anything as she looked to be about 200 years old, but I digress....

When making the left turn (I take up the whole intersection and swing really wide to the right to avoid hitting anyone in the turn lane of the road I am turning on to. ) So, as I am about 90 percent through the intersection, from out of the corner of my eye, I notice movement on my passenger side. I hear another Truck Horn scream out into the air. That is when I notice the little white chevy pick-up (a company vehicle) come flying around my right side on two wheels from out of the right hand turn lane, making the left turn in front of me. Or beside me.... Seriously on two tires, I saw the body of the truck bounce when the other two tires came in contact with the ground. I saw his ladder fly out of the bed of his truck. I saw him almost collide with not only myself, but with the car in front of me.

JACKASS, the reason I was going soooo slow was to avoid pushing Grandma, not because I am loaded heavy or just can't shift my gears quick enough.

There were two young guys in the vehicle and they were having a great time playing Dukes of Hazzard. You could see they were tickled pink with that particular manuever. Any ways, after the near fiasco in the intersection, and following Grandma for about 2 miles, they took off screaming down the little two lane highway at least 60. The road is rated for 45 as there are a lot of driveways and businesses. I saw them almost collide into another vehicle making a turn.

I did manage to get the make and model, tag number and description. I was not able to see the company name on the door. Oh, if I had I would have made a personal visit to their employer just to let them know what these guys were up to in the company truck. I contacted the Sheriffs Office to see if there was anything they could do about it. But with it not being an official emergency, there was little to be done. They humored me by telling me that they would run the tag and drop by the company to report the complaint.

If only.... I would love to find out these boys were fired for reckless endangerment in a company vehicle. I would love for them to see me laughing at them for messing with a big truck. I would love for them to realize I got them fired.... If only.....

Oh well!

Careful, My RoadRage is Showing

I would like to dedicate this post to South Carolina, and all you other idiots who do not respect the highways.



It seems I have more problems with traffic in South Carolina than in any other state. Not accidents, but just plain ol' stooooopid drivers. I have always declared I-85 in SC to be the worst stretch of road for idiots to hang out on, and this is true every single week with no exceptions. Everyone wants to hang out in the center lane talking on the cell phone and not maintaining a consistent speed. And it is not just the automobile drivers, but the Truckers as well.



Does South Carolina cast some sort of stupid spell on its inhabitants of the roadway??? So, it seems.



Today, I would like to address being courteous. A lot of State Departments have signs posted on the interstates to advise drivers to "Move Over or Slow Down " when passing anything official parked on the side of the interstate. Be it an emergency vehicle or just Mr Smokey writing a citation for a speeding vehicle. Typically, most Truck Drivers are looking far enough ahead to notice anything sitting on the shoulder and will adjust accordingly, if the four wheelers will co-operate. However, there are some idiot truckers who do not give plenty of clearance to the Officer on the shoulder, and I have seen them get chased down and fined for not doing so. That cracks me up. Stupid Truckers crack me up!! PERIOD !!



So, yesterday, when I was making my final descent towards home, there was a brokedown fourwheeler, along with tow-truck and assisting officer on the side of the road. I noticed them from about a half mile distance. I put on my blinker and eased to the edge of my lane to let the passing cars know I wanted over..... It is called a TURN SIGNAL... It signals my intended direction!!! During the course of this half mile stretch, there were at least 15 four wheelers that accelerated to pass me, not allowing me to give clearance to the situation on my right.

There are FIVE signals on each side of my Truck. Surely, they saw at least one of them. Right? Of course they did! That is why they gassed on it. To get around the big truck who wanted in the left lane for no apparent reason... By the time we reached the incident, the only courtesy I could give was to slow down. Still on the edge of my lane (okay, I had eased into the left lane about a foot to intimidate the cars), I reduced my speed to roughly 45 mph (on a 70 mph interstate). But alas!, as one of the cars passed me, they begin to blow the horn, I can only assume to indicate that they were not going to let me in the lane. Now, Mr Smokey was busy protecting the tow-truck driver (Protect and Serve) but he quickly left the scene to chase down the fourwheeler who had so rudely just passed with horn blaring! Ha ha ha ha ha a.....

So, for all you idiots who don't know........you are supposed to merge with other traffic and allow plenty of clearance to any situation that may exist on the shoulder of the interstate. Don't always assume that the Big Truck is moving into the left lane just to irritate you. OMG, there might be a legitimate need for that cumbersome truck to get in the left lane. And... Most states have now posted it as a LAW which you can be fined for if you choose to disobey it! As witnessed by myself yesterday.

Freaking Retards!!

Above and Beyond

Every since the new Trucking Company has taken over the account, I can honestly say that I have been very pleased having them as my employer. With the exception of a few trucking issues that could not be avoided otherwise, I have nothing but high praises for The New Employer.

And here is another reason to be grateful. Back in July, all the current drivers were promised a $1000 bonus if we would remain loyal to the Aluminum Co, and make the transfer to the new Trucking Company....Hmmmm did that make sense to you.. You see, some of our drivers have been hauling this stuff for twenty years or better, but have done so through several different trucking companies. Therfore, I declare that remaining loyal. The only stipulation was that we would have to remain with the new company for at least six months.

Well, it has been six months. DAMN, how time flies when you are having fun, and I do adore my new boss. So much better than Homer ever thought of being. So, we were anticipating just exactly how much of our bonus we would receive after taxes were paid.

Holy Cow! Not only did we indeed receive the entire bonus... but they even paid the taxes on it for us. And, they also made my 401K contribution for me. So, my thousand buck bonus cost my employer a little over $1600. I never expected that!

You know, come to think of it, many moons ago when I firsted started in this field, I was told that this was the top Trucking Company in Bama and if I could ever get hired by them, I would be more than satisfied. I must say that ten years later, I have to agree.... so far!

I Don't Need This Crap

Do you remember waaaay back when I tried to chop my thumb off late one Saturday night. September 08, 2007.

That was during the transition of Trucking Companys.

I had paid a premium to continue my health care insurance until the new insurance took over. It took them over 6 weeks to process the payment, by which time the benefits were no longer in affect. However, there was that one little claim that needed to be paid. I was told I was not eligible for coverage when the claim was made. I told them to send me back my premium check (which they had happily cashed) and I would pay my own damn bills. They checked on a few things and decided to pay the claim......

No harm.... No foul.....

Well, they only paid the hospital's invoice. They have yet to render payment to the attending Physician.

So, for the past four months I had received a statement indicating I owe $634.00. For the past four months, I have contacted the insurance company regarding their refusal to pay... And of course, for the past four months they have assured me that it would be handled.

Today, I received another statement. It seems I am now the proud owner of a delinquent account as reported by one of the fabulous credit reporting agencies. In fact, two of them are holding this against me.. WTF !!

So, once again, in the morning I will contact both offices and I will not hang up the phone until this issue is resolved... I would have gladly paid the bill, had they not accepted my premium payment to begin with. But for the nearly $600 premium I paid, I think they should at least honor the freaking policy and pay the damn claim already.

Silly Little Phobias

This is probably the silliest thing you will ever read on this blog. Not silly as in ha~ha, but more along the lines of ' You have got to be kidding me'

One of the things that has been bothering me lately is how empty my life feels. There seems to be a lack of personal relationships with people other than family members. Well, I do have friendships with some of my business acquaintances. But I could have many more. I am a people person. I have no fear of engaging strangers in conversation. I am quick to humor people with my witty sarcasm.

But I have this tiny little phobia that seems to eliminate many people from remaining in my life.

I can not call people on the phone.

Except for a few family members, I do not generally call someone just to chat. I can come up with three excuses for why I am not able to phone a friend. All three reasons seem stupid to me at this point, but I still have anxiety over dialing a phone number. If someone calls me, however, I will chat for hours.

1* I was not allowed to use the phone much as a child/teenager. And I was forbidden to phone a boy! Yeah, I would think I would be over this by now, and I am sure it does not play a big role in my anxiety but I am just trying to cover all the bases.

2* I have dated a few guys in my lifetime that when I would try to reach them, they would be doing something they should not have. You know, for instance.... cheating with another female. Then I would be lied to about why they would not answer the phone, and later find out that the other woman was with them when my call came in. This should not have anything to do with calling friends, but it still plays a role in the anxiety of it all.

3* Septmber 11, 2001. Believe it or not, 9/11 plays a tremendous role in my inability to be able to call people. On that morning, after the news had spread, I called every single number stored in my cell phone. I had plenty of service, so it was not the fact that the signals were jammed. I called family and friends, co-workers, employers... every number!!! I could not get a hold of any one.... I got answering machines and voice mails, but not one single solitary flesh and blood person. At this point in time, the plane heading for the Pentagon had not crashed yet. But the reports were being aired about the hijacked plane that was supposed to be heading for Dulles Airport near DC. HOWEVER....the announcer on the radio station I was listening to kept mispronouncing the destination. She said DALLAS instead of Dulles. Yeah, easily misunderstood except for the fact that I was unloading at DALLAS (DFW)..... The only thing going through my mind was how close I was. I needed to tell everyone how much I loved them because I did not know if I would live to see another day. NO ONE answered the phone, and I felt so insignificant...

So, now anytime I try to call someone, if I don't get an answer, I do relive the anxiety of it all. Of how insignificant I felt that day. Well, not everytime, but quite frequently. Oh, and not with family members.

So.... why am I bringing this up now....

Because I have made several new friends in the past few months and I can't call them. Yes, a few of them are male and have called me on occasion, but they always ask why I never call them. I can completely understand why they would question me on this, but I can't give a legitimate answer. I would take it wrong myself if someone never called me. I have no problem sending a text or an email, but heaven forbid I actually dial a number. I am sure I have lost a few potential friends over this same issue.

So, what do I do? Do I confront my fears and just start dialing numbers. Sure people are busy and can't always answer. I understand that, but there is still that trigger that goes off in my brain. I feel the anxiety of it until I hear back from them and that is no fun. This all seems so childish to me, maybe a touch of low self-esteem. I don't get it. In person, I am not intimidated by anyone. But that damn phone can really hurt my feelings.

So, if you have any thoughts on the topic, please feel free to share. It just all seems so silly to me, but I even felt my chest quicken while typing the 3rd item in my little list. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

Yeah Baby

Damn, I Love New England!!

GO PATRIOTS!!

Sadly, however, The Giants pulled it out with 35 seconds to spare..... Final Score 17~14, but I still declare that I am NOT a Pro Football fan ! Even if I almost broke my toe when I jumped up to cheer as Randy Moss caught the pass that scored the touchdown that almost won the game for the Patriots.

Good News

Well, it seems that my depression seems to be lifting somewhat.. Maybe it helped that I finally got a good cry out of me this past weekend.. It just seems that I have no tears left in me anymore and so it gets harder and harder to vent.

In other news, In the past few weeks, I have not been able to run my beloved NE route at all. When freight slows down, my load is the first to get grabbed up by someone with more seniority than myself. Therefore, I have been running a tad bit closer to home, but my work week has consistently been extended to six days as opposed to my normal four... I have blown out 2 tires, had 2 loads shift, lost a trailer arm due to bolts breaking, been DOT'ed and "shut down" and supposedly blown a Turbo....which resulted in many many many hours of delays and one afternoon sitting on the shoulder of the highway waiting for help. I do not think the Turbo is blown because there were none of the usual symptoms present, but there was indeed five gallons of oil coating every inch of my truck along with about a mile stretch of highway, so yeah, there was definitely something wrong with the truck.

I was also hoping to make a short trip to Bama this month to see the kids, but that has been put on hold. My only weekend free this month was not a good weekend for the folks I was going to visit so, I will try again in March... I will just have to send a goodie box because I already bought valentines and birthday presents for the intended visit. :(

My diet has not been so kind to me this go-round. I can't seem to jump start the loss, BUT... I did quit smoking, and so far without any weight gain... It has been 2 weeks!! I have done very little running during the month of January (5 miles for the entire month, which I believe I did the first week) I pretty much spent every day off sitting in seclusion with my blinds drawn. February is going to be better. I have already logged ten miles in just the first weekend!! So things are looking better on that front.

And just for the record, I am sitting here blogging because I had yet another load shift and it is undeliverable. They will reload it in the morning and I will begin my deliveries on Tuesday. I only made it 80 miles before I had to turn around and bring it back.

Well, Tom Petty is on, so I must go enjoy the halftime show (I am not a Pro Football Fan, but all of my customers are either Patriots or Giants Fans and they would be severely disappointed if I could not exchange banter over this particular event. Besides, that Tom Brady sure is a looker!! and the commercials are usually pretty good too, but Iron Bowl, it is not!!

Oh yeah, spell check is not working so if you find any errors... Get Over It!!