Sleepless In Seattle

How can a bright beautiful day tun so dark with no warning?

Wednesday morning started out back in Queens, NY... Jimmy brought me breakfast. Angelo brought me coffee...My friend in Virginia wanted me to stop and have dinner with him.. The sky was beautiful and the sun shining very brightly. For most of the day, I had a song on my lips and was feeling very cheerful..

With no warning, I became very sullen and somber. The reality of my solitude creeps up on me and occasionally brings about depression.

This usually occurs when I am not resting well, or eating good....

I am not tired or hungry. Hopefully tomorrow's sunrise will put the smile back on my face...

Come to think of it, I have not been resting well.. I do get at least 6 hours of sleep a night, but the past 4 nights have been very restless sleep. Waking up multiple times during the night to look at the clock only to realize i have only been asleep an hour or so.. Hmmmmm? That's odd because I don't feel stressed about anything at all..

Wait a minute... I did receive another email from HIM.....

And every time I hear from him, I stop breathing.....

I will always love him....

Too bad it was never meant to be. But with every email exchanged, I tend to lose focus of everything for about a week. That includes sleeping, eating and the tendency to become sullen.. It is a bittersweet feeling for me and I do not regret going through it occasionally, I just hope it does not last too long. I don't like being sad!!