Positive Influences

Sunset in The Ozarks

A few weeks ago ( or longer) I had the pleasure of running out to Texas and along the way, got to meet up with fellow blogger Gabsatrucker. We were able to spend a few hours together chatting away like two schoolgirls and seem to get along quite splendidly. Gabby is so awesome and extremely devoted to keeping fit. I told her I had lost motivation and she was able to give me a magazine that had a section directed at starting a new running program and a guideline to follow.

She also said to me that it is not important how hard you strive as long as you get moving! Essentially I believe she meant that even if you cannot go out and run long and hard, at least just get out there. ( Forgive me, as these are not direct quotes, but I am exhausted and well, you get the jest of it).

So, I began a newly modified version of this program and have been quite successful at keeping up with it. It is a slow starter, but I am apt to push to hard and burn out after a few months, so this is doing wonders for building my stamina and encouraging motivation. The only problem I seem to be having is that I cannot always find the time to run. I know, sounds like another excuse, but after a 14 hour day of non-stop deliveries along with 3 to 4 hundred miles of driving, 10pm is just not the best time to get out and run in some of my delivery neighborhoods.

Tonight I ran into that exact problem. After driving 596 miles, dusk was catching up with me very quickly. I had to get fuel before I could allow myself time for a run, and fueling could not be done until I got close to the end of my day. I expressed my dismay to a friend, and he concurred that I should be happy with the fact that the desire is so strong, but some days I will just not be able to do it. The more I thought about it, the more it sounded like an excuse! So, I got my run in tonight. I will not settle for excuses anymore. It was a boring run around a parking lot but I got it done and satisfied my need.

Anyways, I have completely digressed. My point is that Gabby has made such a positive influence upon me, and her husband is awesome too! I had the pleasure of visiting with them last week, again. This time we set out on an approximate 2.5 mile walk across the Big Dam Bridge. Such a beautiful place! Afterwards we grabbed a bite to eat and chatted some more. I am really grateful I have gotten to meet these two wonderful people!! and the influence reaches even further.

Due to my enthusiasm, my niece and nephew have also been bitten by the bug. When I am at home, they often ask to tag along on my running adventures. Of course, because they are young, I take them to the local track so I can keep an eye on them. Last week, they went with me and both of them were able to complete 2 miles easily. They opted to rest while I finished up my workout, but I just think that is so awesome!!

Anywho, way past time for bed and I no longer make sense to myself, but I just felt the need to share!!

When The Cat's Away

Here is a little video my brother and I worked on this past weekend..



Hope you enjoy!

Happy 26th Birthday

Last week my niece discovered just how old I really am and it disturbed her. "It just can't be!" she exclaimed. So it was decided that I am unofficially 26 this year.

Last Monday was my , ummm, 26th birthday and it worked out very nicely for me. I was on a short run through Alabama so I got to stop in at Dad's house and have dinner with my SIL and two nephews. They bought me a T-Shirt with the caption " I am not SHORT, I am Fun-Sized!!"

How True!

My mother sent me a box of Bath and Body Works goodies!! Yummy, and my Dad bought me some books on one of my wish lists!! Score!! My other SIL, knowing how much I love candles, bought me a collection of Yankee Candles. And to finish the week out, there was a family gathering at my Mothers' to celebrate all of the May Birthdays...

I purchased an MP3 player for my nephew, and I fear we have created a monster... He was delighted with it, as it is his first, and could be heard singing U2 for several hours on end. Not to mention the brownie points I scored with him!

Yes, I missed my beloved New England route, but as an alternate course, the Bama run worked out quite nicely...

I am doing it again this week!

I Sound Just Like My Mother...eek

This period of depression seems to have taken me to an all new low. I hate to even bring this to my blog, but I just feel so alone right now. I do not do a written journal, so here is where I choose to dump this crap.



I am having trouble seeing the meaning of it all.



No husband, no children, no direction it seems. My job limits my capabilities of getting out and starting something new that remotely resembles having a normal life. My finances prohibit me from just starting a new job, that resembles a normal life. My social life suffers because I am not around enough to develop normal relationships. I can't have a pet because it would have no one around to care for it.



Am I really just supposed to work every day so that I can provide myself a roof over my head. And the roof over my head just provides a place to camp out until I go back to work.



The thoughts are really weighing on me, and I know better.. I know that everyone enjoys my presence. I know that my acquaintances cannot believe that I am single, because I am soooo awesome to be with. Children love me, animals love me.. I have no problem making people smile or laugh... I leave a good impression in my wake. And I am generally in a great mood 95% of the time.



But right now, I feel so fat and ugly.... I am bitter, which makes me feel even uglier.



The real reason for my depression is that something happened 20 years ago, and it just won't seem to go away.. I have let it go.. Most of the family does not speak of it. It is almost taboo.



Until one of the parties involved was asked a question by a child.





"Why did that happen?" The blame was claimed by the person being asked and the child moved on to another subject....



It was then mentioned to me... I have been depressed ever since. And I don't think it is the topic that depressed me so.... I believe it is the fact that another generation has entered the realm of judging me for something that happened years ago. I love this child, but they have a certain finesse for making me feel inadequate...



Okay, I suck! I screwed up.. If you are going to judge me, please just do it behind my back... I don't think I can take much more criticism...



Okay, now I am going to go watch some sappy love story and hopefully I can get a good cry out of it. I have a lot of emotion pent up right now, and I could really use the release.



Oh, one more thing.... PLEASE do not mention this to that child... They do not need to know anything else about it. I am strong, I will survive, and I will get over this soon..

Art

The most recent trip I made to Bama yielded the fine artistic talents of my beloved babies!!

First up, the Bri-baby did a self portrait for me.

Next, Wonder Boy helped out by drawing a logo for my blog!! Complete with flames, representing the rage I express on the road! hee hee....

He Did It Again!!

I really have to be more careful with what I say in front of my youngest nephew. He is quite the intellectual.

I am sure you are now interested as to how he corrected me this time.

Well, on the way to my Mothers house, I kind of got off the beaten path. I had my 2 older nephews with me and they also were unfamiliar with the new terrain. So we just did a little sightseeing. I finally recognized a familiar street sign, but was still unsure as to which direction we needed to head, so we took a wild guess, assuming we were probably wrong, and pushed forward. Surprise, we were right where we needed to be.

Upon telling this story to the rest of the family, everyone was in agreement that it was extremely difficult to get lost in this particular city, including the brainchild whom is only 8 years old. I mentioned the name of the "Familiar Street Sign" which guided us safely back to our predetermined course. It was Sixth Street.

Now let me just say this. The reason that this particular sign was so familiar to me is because, I HAVE GOT LOST in this city before.

Before I could even finish the story, J quietly interrupts me and states " Dont you mean 6th Avenue???"

Why, yes I do.... Touche'

That Boy IS SMART.

During my weekend visit to my brothers house, a discussion was started by my 8 year old nephew. The Topic was population in US major cities.

He asked a few opinion questions and stated a few facts. Then began the responses... Now, there were three of us in the car well over 8 years old and we all responded in turn. Not surprisingly, the three adults unanimously agreed that the 8 year old might not have his facts quite so accurate. He took this in stride and did not offer any type of rebuttle.

When we got back to the house, I quickly jumped on the net and looked up the population charts. Turns out the Nephew was completely accurate and the Aunt, the Father, and the Grandfather had no idea what they were talking about.

Way to go Jordan. This is actually not too surprising. One of my nephews favorite things to do is draw the state of Alaska and identify different counties. I dont think I was even aware that counties existed at that age, much less be able to identify any. And did I mention that at the age of 5 he was teaching his younger sister to speak some spanish. Now, that is a smart child!!